I spent the past few years wondering what was ‘wrong’ with me. Trying to understand why I couldn’t will myself back to health.
Was my attitude too negative? No.
Was I thankful for everything that I had? Yes.
Was I a good friend, daughter, and sister? Yes.
Could I get out of bed? No.
Was there a way to stop crying? No.
Could I see an end to the pain? No.
Did I want to live? No.
I eventually recognized that I was dealing with an illness after a very long internal battle. I spent the majority of 2011 and 2012 away from my friends and family.
I checked myself into a hospital.
I worked on my depression.
I had support — a loving family, partner, and friends.
I missed all family holidays in 2012.
I started to venture back home in 2013 because I had made progress with my depressive illness.
I spent more time with my family. And, after warning signs I began to worry about my younger brother.
I tried to understand. I tried to help. We all tried to help. We didn’t succeed. He took his own life three weeks ago.
It affects everyone.
It’s not something to whisper about.
Extend a helping hand.
Be a human being.
We are all human.
We are all family.