Janine’s Story
Until just recently, I've been a grown-up playing pretend. Pretending to be okay, pretending that I don't have a problem severe enough to get help, pretending that my past isn't affecting my present.
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Working to end the stigma and discrimination of mental illness.
Until just recently, I've been a grown-up playing pretend. Pretending to be okay, pretending that I don't have a problem severe enough to get help, pretending that my past isn't affecting my present.
I was sexually abused the majority of my childhood. My abuse started from when I was just a little girl and ended the summer when I went into sixth grade.
My husband worked as a paramedic for 16 years. During the last 4 years of service it was becoming apparent he could no longer handle the job. He was offered limited counseling but decided to leave in 2004. PTSD was not something we were familliar with at that time.. so we sought counseling for depression,anger management and ultimately - marriage counseling.
I work in the department of psychiatry at a hospital. Today I sat at a meeting with other employees in that department around a long table. Mostly I was recognized a co-worker, but a few people noticed me as a patient.
After a rape at age 17, I was diagnosed with PTSD. I had also suffered bouts of Depression throughout my life but was ALWAYS in denial. I believed it was just a matter of thinking positive thoughts.
But mostly, I truly hope that one day in my lifetime, I will see the need for these types of sites to vanish, that the general public will embrace and understand those of us with mental illnesses, and support systems will be a given, not a gift.
You’re trapped! You can’t imagine getting out of that dark place of despair. The walls are closing in. To make matters worse, people are telling you “Congratulations, you must be so happy!” Your guilt for feeling the exact opposite silences your screams and so you just nod and say thank you.
I've tried to open a dialogue with my sister and parents but haven't gotten very far. My mental health has always been the big dead whale in the middle of the room that no one seems to notice.
My motto is, "just because I have a mental illness does not make me bananas." I'm a person, not a diagnosis.
When I walked into the doctor’s office on May 9th, 2011, I wasn’t expecting to be diagnosed with unintentional post-traumatic stress disorder.