Here we are: 2017 with a new President and everything that comes with that. Closer to home, we have snow and everything that comes with that. I much prefer the snow.
I made a grave error over the holidays: I ate everything in sight! Now I have to try to revert to what I was eating before Thanksgiving – NOT MUCH!! Not wanting to become diabetic is what makes me resist my appetite; if it wasn’t for medical reasons I would eat myself into oblivion. But that’s not what makes the New Year great. I like to think positive thoughts about 2017, not just those common resolutions like relationships and whether we’ll get a new dog or cat.
This year I’ll make a grand effort to stop my quiet temper tantrums over taking my medications. Almost every night, when I glance at my clock and see it’s almost 8pm, I want to say “NO!!!!!!!!! I’m so sick and tired of taking these damn pills!!” But guess what? I take them anyway. For all of us who take medication, I concur that it’s a pain-in-the-ass routine. For all of us who feel really good and think we can get away with stopping our meds, THINK and REMEMBER how it used to be. All I have to do is remember what it felt like to be catatonic, hiding in the closet, the unbearableness of it all. I wouldn’t mind being manic for a few hours but I wouldn’t trust myself to not wrecking my life again. I don’t want to have to apologize over and over again like I did when mania finally left years ago. So, I take them.
So far 2017 sees me eating less and sticking to (not whining about) my medications.
2017 will see me walking my dogs every day, not just when I feel like it. Walking dogs is code for getting exercise. I am in the process of resigning from the athletic club I belonged to because I NEVER WENT!! I’ve been paying for over a year and have only gone once and that was awful; I joined a yoga class and couldn’t do much. I don’t know why I didn’t resign my membership that very day – pride? Walking my dogs not only gives them time out of the house but I get the kind of brisk walking that is recommended to anyone.
It’s snowing tonight as I write to you. The sidewalk is dusty with snow showing the tread of my shoes and the paw tracks of one of my dogs – Rosco if you must know. Tomorrow, by mid-morning, the tracks will be replaced with snow shovel marks. But the snow will be back.
I think 3 resolutions is enough, just the right number to uphold. Eating right, not whining about taking my meds and walking the dogs: I can do that.
I’m including a painting by my eldest son, Calen Pick, who lives with schizoaffective disorder. ‘Cottonwoods on the River’ and, as you can see, it is winter here in Montana.